I have imagined this day in my mind before,
But never really thought it would ever come,
I’ve cried and laughed
I’ve walked away and returned again
Each walk away felt like giving up
On something I’ve worked so hard at building
Like it was a part of me
How do you get so attached, so fused to something that it actually hurts as you try and separate?
But staying hurt more,
It guaranteed the continuous flow of cries, triggered by repetitive hurts
And now standing strong at the door
So close to the outside
All that I’m leaving behind, the past,
looked so familiar and felt so comfortable.
I can’t stand it anymore
But I’m used to it,
I want out, I want in
I want life but this is all the life I’ve known.
Free, Grown and Happy
These words so close to my face I can almost touch them.
This is all I want to feel.
But so scared of change, will I survive the scary future ahead?
Will I find myself again or will I lose myself to familiarity?
If I take a step out, will I fall or will the air pull me up to a fly?